Dairy Divination

Up until taking the position at my current job, I always believed bad days vs. good days and predicting what was in store, really was just a matter of what you made it to be. There was no horoscope, crystal ball or Ouija Board that would let you know what was in the stars.

Then I saw the Queen City Creamery Ice Cream sandwich board.

On my first day I didn't pay too much attention to that little board with it's sans serif letters. Ice cream of the day: French silk, Weekly sorbet flavor: cherry. No big deal, right?

WRONG. Little did I know that the flavors would come to dictate my life. Yes people - my daily horoscope/crystal ball/Ouija board is the flavor of the day ice cream.

For instance, the day I got the flu while in the middle of covering a drunk-driving simulator - the ice cream flavor was peanut butter swirl and the sorbet was grape. For those of you who've vaguely remember meeting me it probably came up in conversation almost immediately that I hate peanut butter. There are literally few things worse to me than peanut butter (coming in behind dictatorships and train wrecks). I just want to apologize to the West Virginia State Police for possibly ruining that $50K piece of equipment with my vom. Next time I'll just turn right back around and go home when it's peanut butter day.

Everyday when I get off of the downtown exit my palms get sweaty and I get nervous. I tell myself "You're not going to look today, don't look" because at least if I don't look, I don't know what's coming. But everyday without fail at the last possible second I turn my head and there it is - my future for the the entire world to see (and consume).

On good flavor days (Guinness, strawberry swirl, German chocolate cake) I'm bolder. I delve deeper into my work, throw myself under the bus, knowing I'll come out clean as a whistle. But on the flip side, when it's flavors like Take Five bar, Irish Cream or (gulp) peanut butter in any shape or form, I cower at my desk, with the shades drawn, trying not to draw attention to myself and slip below the cosmos radar.

Luckily today seems like a good flavor, Kahlua Mocha Cheesecake. That sort of thing really gives you hope on a Monday. It let's you know that despite being the beginning of another week, it won't be so bad.